#LoveIsland #pshe #gender- how many sexual partners have you had? 

200-300Monday night boarding duty and LoveIsland was on again.  It’s on at 9pm for those that feel they are missing out.

This week they played a game, how well do you know your partner? Questions to the woman included what is their middle name? What do they find attractive in a man? and what turns them on? The men however got asked what is their fav sex position? and how many sexual partners have they had? WHY WHY WHY the different questions? Is this a gender issue or am I making a mountain out of a mole hill? My instinct is that it’s still not ok for woman to admit that they have a fav sexual position or to discuss how many people they have had sex with no matter what the number. And this annoys me.  I discuss this a lot in pshe lessons, a woman who sleeps around is called a slag or slut according to my pupils but a man is called a hench. When are we ever going to move past this? How can it still be an issue in 2017 that if a woman has slept with more than one man she is treated with disrespect and if a man hasn’t slept with anyone or the number is low (?) then he is teased and receives banter ( don’t get me started on the definition of this). And if this is the case what is the magic number?

Talking of numbers one of the contestants claimed that he couldn’t remember how many people he had slept with but it was between 200 and 300. Now I said the word “claimed” because I agree with one of the woman contestants who was a little cynical and suggested that maybe some males contestants would exaggerate on national TV and ” make things up”.  But when he said the number ” between 200 and 300″ none of them were shocked, there was admiration in the male faces and no real response from the woman. The topic somehow quickly moved onto the next question.  I however stopped to talk to my boarders. We got the calculator out and worked out that was sex every 20 days with a different person. ( he is in his 30 and we guessed he started having sex at 16) “that’s a lot of sex” said one of my boarders. I asked but surely he had sex with at least one of these people more than once!  And what about the fact that he can’t remember who he has slept with, isn’t this a little worrying? If he can’t remember this, would he remember to wear a Condom? And why did none of the others ask him that? What are his thoughts about catching an STI? Does he test himself regularly to check that he is ok?

We often hear the argument of why Sex Ed should be taught in school and watching this programme is proof enough.  This is on at 9 pm every night, but you can watch it at any time if you download it. Monday night episode alone was watched by 1.6 Million people. 1.6 Million people…………………

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Assistant Head ( DSL) at a boarding school. Interested in all PSHE and safeguarding topics.

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