When would you tell your SLT that you are struggling with anxiety? #MH

After reading Cee brilliant blog post http://cstreetlights.com/realized-clothes-meant-me/ I spent a lot of time thinking. There was so much that I wanted to say or ask about the clothing issue that it distracted from the real issue, that Cee didn’t have a good relationship with her SLT so couldn’t tell them that she was struggling. 

Although a big deal at the time the skirt and if it was appropriate or not  for school seem insignificant. It was the way that member of staff spoke to her that made me sad and the fact the Cee couldn’t explain how hard it had been to get up and come in that day. This is a valuable lesson for SLT, one that I am still trying to get right. 

In some ways I can relate to the SLT ( administrator) who spoke to Cee who mentioned her concern wondering what she was going to wear. There are times when I dread going into the staff room to see several staff not wearing their lanyards. I look down and then up, we have eye contact, I don’t say anything as I think they have seen me and will do something about it. Then at break later in the day they are still sitting there in the staff room without a lanyard on. Ughhhh I have to say something now, why aren’t they wearing it?  do I say it in front of their collegues, which could be embarrassing or shall I ask to have a quiet word, which could make a bigger deal out of it than it really is. Do I send then an email? That’s not my style and seems weak to me. So I make a joke ” oh you are naked today, no lanyard”. Then there is that awkward silence, they either quickly go to their pocket/ bag and produce it, or make a silly comment.  All good although 2 day later, there they are again sitting having a coffee without a lanyard on.   Honestly this is part of the job I hate.  I can deal with pupils and parents and I think I have a great working relationship with staff but I do find it hard to support them as well as the pupils, after all they are adults. God that makes me sound like a bitch, doesn’t it. Perhaps the fact that I realise that I need to be more supportive is what makes me ok. Thinking about it further I think I do a good job as a member of SLT.  I have learnt to be honest and fair no matter what. Even if that member of staff isn’t necessarily my cup of tea, I am their line manager and someone who needs to support and guide them and this is what was sad about Cee article. Her line manager didn’t sound fair and seemed to have some sort of grudge. There are some staff at my school pictured here, who I know it’s hard, that they have so much going on and I will try to help as much as possible. But there are those that don’t tell me, don’t want me to know. They have put their makeup and mask on to face school and would be horrified if they realised I could see the cracks. @cstreetlights would relate to this but it’s obvious that she needed to talk to someone at sch, someone needed her back. And this is my questions, when would you tell a member of SLT that you were struggling. Today on your holiday your answer is probably going to be very different to when you are in the middle of report season and if any of my staff are reading this and want to chat please do find me. I realise I may have come across as bit heartless but I do want to help and if I do have to say something I don’t want to make matters worse. With this in mind thank you @cstreetlights for your reflective blog post. 

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Assistant Head ( DSL) at a boarding school. Interested in all PSHE and safeguarding topics.

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