Couldn’t sleep last night, I was running a situation throughmy head. I was not confident about a decision I had made. Well that’s not true.I was confident at the time, but then I started talking to other people,gathering their opinion and of course that added doubt. Not everyone agreeswith the decision you make, coming up with their thoughts and concerns, whichof course they should do and we need to do that, but it means that sometimes wedon’t agree. And someone needs to make adecision, which I did. And now I can’t sleep.
Every situation is different and therefore you cannot alwaysfollow a formula. And people believe very strongly in their opinion, a sign ofa healthy school I think, where a voice would be heard and documented if theyfelt it needed to be. But then we need to move forward and not hold grudges orbring the “ disagreement “ up, again and again. This can be hard for bothparties. Makes meetings longer and stressful.
I went downstairs and stared at the fridge ( not sleepingisn’t good for your figure). I tried to watch rubbish on TV, read a book but mymind kept going through the situation. Irole played conversations, thought of positives and negative for both arguments,but of course all of these had variables. You cannot predict people and what they will do. I find this harder whenyou are dealing with older students, those that are almost 18. They come tosituations with so much baggage and have a natural tendency to do riskythings. You can talk to them as they areadults but then do things you don’t expect. But then need you to benon-judgemental, especially if you are going to help and this can be hard.
I ended up logging onto the school account and writing upall my thoughts. I figured that having the argument with myself and documentingit would be a good way of trying to clear the head and it worked, but this wasat 3am and this cannot be good for my wellbeing. What’s my plan for tonight andsleep? Good question. Wish I was my cat now.